#400- Dr. Justin J. Lehmiller - Dr. Justin J. Lehmiller On The Science Of Sexual Desire, Fantasies, Porn, Threesomes, & Stronger Relationships

The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast#400- Dr. Justin J. Lehmiller


( 0:55 ): Welcome back to TSC HIM & HER Show. #400: Dr. Justin J. Lehmiller is an American social psychologist and author. Lehmiller is a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University. Lehmiller has authored books such as Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life and The Psychology of Human Sexuality. Today Dr. Lehmiller joins us to discuss sexual desire, fantasies, threesomes, and how sex can strengthen our relationship bonds.


( 2:44 ): Lauryn says, “Justin, give our audience a little bit of context of what you do because it’s really interpreting.”

( 3:20 ): Lauryn says, “So if you were to be the micro manager of sex ed in 2021, what criteria and curriculum would we be receiving?”

( 5:23 ): Lauryn says, “Can you talk a little bit about shame? And how maybe you’ve seen people you work with experience shame?”

( 6:40 ): Lauryn asks, “What are some things that the general public just doesn’t know about swingers?”

( 8:47 ): Michael asks, “How do you get everybody on the same page especially as there are multiple people entering the stage?”

( 10:07 ): Lauryn asks, “What are some things that have gone real fucking wrong with swinging, and what are some things that work really well? And maybe you could talk about threesomes too.”

( 17:55 ): Michael asks, “In your research, why are people so uncomfortable talking about sex? And how have you been able to either coach or work with people to be able to communicate with their partners about what they actually want?”

( 19:11 ): Michael asks, “But how do you get people to that point?”

( 20:17 ): Lauryn asks, “What is the most outlandish fantasy you’ve ever heard?”

( 22:12 ): Lauryn says, “Taylor’s very open about sex. He’s come on this podcast many times and talked about his problem of coming too soon. We’ve gotten a lot of different tips for him. Where would you tell Taylor to start?”

( 27:03 ): Lauryn asks, “What is the trick to a phenomenal blowjob?”

( 28:08 ): Lauryn asks, “Is there any tips for guys?”

( 29:42 ): Lauryn asks, “What is the best, most sensual, hottest sex toy that is new on the market?”

( 31:01 ): Lauryn says, “Everyone is like optimizing everything, but they’re not optimizing their sex life. Why do you think that is?”

( 32:37 ): Lauryn asks, “Why do people cheat in the first place?”

( 33:28 ): Lauryn asks, “What are some new things that people can try in the bedroom right now?”

( 37:53 ): Lauryn asks, “How do you think social media has changed the landscape of sex?”

( 38:53 ): Michael says, “Let’s take social media and even porn; let’s stretch it to porn. Like a lot of these things are so sensationalized now. Do you think it’s setting up unrealistic expectations for people in the bedroom and harming their sex life?”

( 41:38 ): Lauryn asks, “Taylor, when you search for porn is there something specific you’re looking for? And do you have rituals when you set up your porn station three times a day.”

( 42:15 ): Lauryn says, “I’m sure you’ve talked to a lot of porn stars. I know you told us the behind the scene during, but what is the behind the scene general in their lives?”

( 45:22 ): Lauryn says, “I have seen though a lot of porn stars get into relationships with strong men and it always-that I’ve seen-it ends up in gloating.”

( 47:31 ): Lauryn asks, “In your life, in your sex, do you feel like you’re so equipped because of what you do? Or are you constantly working at it? And are you like a monogamous person? Do you have a girlfriend, boyfriend? What’s your flavor?”

( 49:38 ): Lauryn asks, “A book, a podcast, a resource that you would leave our audience with besides your book that I’m going to talk about in a minute for sex? Like if someone is feeling like they need to spice things up, where would they go?”

( 50:15 ): Lauryn says, “Tell us about your book. Your Instagram, your website—all the things.” 

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